DEFINITION OF MARRIAGE
Marriage is a sacred institution where a man and a woman vow to fulfill certain responsibilities to each other and to the society Marriage is the pledging of the two people to have a meaningful partnership to form a Family and to make a Home.
Marriage is a social and legal commitment to share their lives and family responsibilities.
It is an intimate, intense, life-long attachment and can lead to most fruitful and satisfying relationship.
It is said “ Marriage is an old form of association, it was never perfect; it will be never perfect; yet it is happiest wrong we are doing on earth.Marriage is unique union of two bodies, two minds, two hearts, and two person It is a remarkable institution and if it has to turn into a beautiful experience, the girl and the boy have to make some preparations in terms of acquiring right information understanding:-
- mutual co-operation
- interpersonal relationship
- Premarital guidance and counselling because there is no training course for becoming a husband or wife or a parent.
- Marriage is something like a tour the destination being the whole life. Marriage guidance is like a vaccine.
Why a person gets married ?
- Social and emotional security
- Support and parenthood
- Relationship is special
- It is not only to satisfy sexual needs
- Trust and respect for each other
- Ability of adjustment
- effective communication
SELECTION OF PARTNER
Selection of the marriage partner is a difficult job. There is no set formula for selection.
- Matching their height
- Blood group
Do not marry a blood relative because the recessive genes in both the partners become dominant in their child and the child may be born mentally retarded or with a hereditary disease.
It is advisable to get the complete medical check-up, including the genital examination, of both. In addition to routine investigations, blood should be examined for special test and semen analysis should be done in case of men.
Mental state of the person can be assessed by closely observing the behavior of the person.
- Addiction to alcohol or drugs ?
- Does he talk about commit in suicide ?
- Suspicious nature?
- Does he laugh or cry for no reason ?
- Is he emotionally blunt ?
- Does he show disturbance of memory Orientation Attention Intelligence perception ?
- Does he look depressed, not interested in the surroundings ?
- Is he in his own world for hours together ?
- Has he become lazy and remains unclean ?
SELECTION OF PARTNER
- Physical or mental handicap
- Cultural background
If the answer is yes, take it seriously and do not think of marrying such a person. In mental illness , madness is not the only problem. There are several other psychiatric disorders that can make your married life miserable.
If you strongly feel that you both are not meant for each other, and you do not wish to select his as your partner, do not hesitate to refuse the alliance, without falling a prey to pressurization. Similarly , if you are rejected , do not feel dejected or offended. There is no dearth for the partners. Perhaps you will find a better partner.
Man gives love to get sex ; woman gives sex to get love.
Woman is Wife for a while & Mother. forever Men and women are equal , but not similar.
Men & Women are Not Opposite Sexes , But are complementary sexes.
LOVE MARRIAGE vs ARRANGE MARRIAGE
In a love marriage the boy knows the girl, while in an arranged marriage the boy does not know the girl till he gets married.
Though, in love marriage you know the person, she may show you the best side of her. Real person will be known only after staying together continuously for a year or two.
Reconciliation is nearly impossible, because their expectations are high and fulfilment are low. As per the researchers’ Opinion, the factors for making the marriage successful.
How to select a life partner and what to see ?
There is no typical formula for such selection. Neither it is possible to apply the same yardstick to every one, nor it is possible to get a completely matching and ideal partner.
understand the ways of communication their thoughts Beliefs their ideas and elsewhere, though most pleasurable at this age, would make you miss these opportunities to understand each other.
Similar interests are as:
- Interest in game, sports, and movies have little binding effect.
- Similar background
- Similar values
- Similar attitudes
- Physical health
- Mental Health
One has to be a good friend before one can be a loving , faithful spouse.
Lastly Marriage is not for every one. It is not compulsory that every one on earth should marry. People with personality problems should never marry. Some never find a person with whom they can be happy .Do not feel guilty because you choose to be single.
- Age of the marriage
- Consanguineous marriage
- Blood group
- History of diseases in the family
- HIV testing
- The divorce rate is ever increasing, one of the reasons being Wrong selection of the partner.
- Failure to understand the limitations of marriage institution etc.
- Complete their education , to share responsibilities of home and of their children.
Woman 21-28 years and man 24-30 years for doing Marriage. Woman after the age of 35 years may find difficulty in getting pregnant. Chances of the abnormality in a child born out of a sperm from the man of over 55 yrs also increase .
Issues for consideration
The various issues which one has to know before Marriage include Behavior during courtship Problems related to premarital sex.
Adjustment of menstrual cycle at the time of Marriage Expectations at the time of marriage and just married period Human body and sexual Relationship Contraception and use of family planning methods.
Conception-Knowledge about pregnancy and child birth.
Myths and misconceptions surrounding sexuality.
- Hymen White discharge Intercourse.
- First-night expectations etc.
- Timing of the first pregnancy.
- Spacing for the second child.
- Handling of unwanted pregnancy.